Adoption Frustration

I am so frustrated. Yesterday I emailed our case worker at our adoption agency. I wanted to make sure that she had received our updated Birth Parent letter (my husband had dropped it off last week and our last name wasn't on it). I also asked if there had been anyone looking at our profile, etc.

Well, I received a reply saying that she had received it (she thought). She thinks??? No. If you don't know, you check. You don't say, "I think." Adoption costs people a lot of money. You need to be certain you received their paperwork. The caseworker also neglected to answer the other questions I had asked. She didn't even acknowledge that I had asked her anything else.

Maybe I wouldn't be so frustrated if I didn't feel so forgotten. Before things changed at the agency, our caseworker (a wonderful woman who was forced into retirement) sent us monthly updates. She would call us and let us know what was happening with our particular case...we didn't even need to call her. I know that what our first case worker did was above and beyond what others would do. However, when we met with agency staff in July, we asked about a newsletter with updates. We stated that it didn't have to be involved, just how many babies were being placed, how many birth parents were coming in, how many still looking, etc. Information they have. We were told that a newsletter would be coming soon. Well, its approaching the end of September and still no newsletter. We had even offered to do the newsletter for them (type it, etc.).

I've always bragged about our agency. I've told people how wonderful they are. How they go above and beyond. I'm not feeling that way anymore. In fact, when our year of waiting is up and we have to update all of our paperwork and pay more money for stuff we've already paid for, I think we'll switch agencies. I am so disappointed to say that, but I doubt they'll care. They don't seem to notice us anyway.

Wish us luck. Until next time...

I Believe...

I received this e-mail today. It was called "I believe..." I didn't write this, but I do believe these things.

I believe... that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
I believe...that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that. You'll hurt them too.
I believe...that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. (if you work at it)
I believe...that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
I believe...that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be. (and I'm not sure I'll ever get there)
I believe...that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It maybe the last time you see them.
I believe...that you can keep going long after you can't.
I believe...that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
I believe... that either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I believe...that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.
I believe...that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.
I believe...that money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I believe...that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.
I believe...that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up.
I believe...that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.
I believe...that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
I believe...that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
I believe...that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself. (I believe...that forgiving yourself is harder than forgiving others.)
I believe...that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief. (This is a proven fact...in extreme cases the world may pause...but it NEVER stops.)
I believe...that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become. (Amen to that!)
I believe...that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.
I believe...that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I believe...that two people can look at the exact same thing and seesomething totally different.
I believe...that your life can be changed in a matter of hours (seconds) by people who don't even know you.
I believe...that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.
I believe...that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
I believe...that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

Aaahhhh...blue skies...finally! Okay, so this picture is not from today, but after days (at least is seems like it) of rain or gray skies and cold I needed to see blue skies. Of course, being the kind, generous person that I am (I can hear you laughing!!!!), I decided to share them with you...just in case you live in the same area I do and are also working on your ark.

**This picture is not from my neighborhood. It was taken in August when we took a family vacation to Columbus, OH.

Where ever you are, I hope that you wake up to a beautiful sunny day tomorrow.

G'night.

No "Next" Button

Ok...I know in the scheme of things that this is a minor thing...but can some one please explain to me about the blogs that have no "next blog" button? How do you exit these things quickly? I end up hitting the back button and then hit the "next" button on the previous blog which thankfully takes me to a totally different blog than the one without the "next" button (a bit confusing, eh?). This always seems to happen to me when I land on a blog I REALLY don't want to be at.

Today, I was "blog browsing" and landed on one with a transvestite doing things to him/herself that I really didn't feel like looking at. I hit the "next" button. I landed on a blog with NO "next" button. So, I had to go back to the transvestite blog and hit "next." AGAIN...a blog with no button. Arrrrgh!!! This happened 4 times!!! A record. If the person on the blog I was trying to get away from, checks their stats, I'm sure they'll wonder why the same person kept leaving and coming back (especially since the "visits" were less than 10 seconds each).

Seriously, if anyone can tell me how to exit the blogs without a "next" button, I would really appreciate it. I have nothing against transvestites but if I wanted to see a person doing what this person was doing, I would just type in a web address that would take me to one of those sites.

I hope some one can help me out.

A Bit of Humor

I wasn't planning on posting today. I had nothing really to say. Yesterday, I had a complaint and was going to post a rant. Then Christi (see previous post) popped into my head (as she's been doing a lot lately) and I felt really selfish for complaining about something so minor.

Today, however, I have a humerous incident (at least Hubby and I found it humerous) that I wanted to share.

This morning, Peanut walked into the master bedroom and got on the bed. He looked at Hubby and said, "I've got three minutes."

"Three minutes for what?" ask Hubby.

"To play on the bed," replied Peanut like he was talking to a person who has cognitive difficulties.

"Just don't jump on the bed," I told Peanut.

"I'll try not to," was the reply I received.

He's not even three and he totally cracks me up (although I try not to always let him know that).

Have a great day!

Say A Prayer for Christi

Fall is almost here and with it my yearly "break-down." October is an incredibly difficult month for me. This year I will be facing the 6 year anniversary of the death (and birth) of my daughters. Through the years, people have asked me how I've been able to handle it. My reply is almost always, "Because I had to."

About a year ago, I came across a blog about an amazing girl and her incredible family. They have made everything I have ever gone through in my life seem like a cake walk. I have been reading this blog infrequently over the past year. Recently though, I have increased my reading.

It doesn't take long for someone reading Christi's blog (www.christithomas.blogspot.com) to become absorbed in her family's trials and triumphs. If you can read Christi's blog and keep dry eyes, you are the only one. This young girl has been fighting cancer for a number of years. Amazingly, she has managed to keep a great sense of humor and an outlook that people with "easy" lives rarely have. Her family's strength and faith is something that I admire tremendously.

Earlier this week, Christi took a turn for the worse. Her parents had started to make preparations for her "Celebration of Life" (I don't remember the exact phrase but that's essentially it). I urge you to visit this site if you haven't already. Be sure to read the comments. It is absolutely amazing to me how the plight of one small girl and her family has attracted so many people (from around the world). Everyone is praying for Christi and her family. Please join those of who have never met The Thomas', but who have grown to feel close to them through reading their blog, in praying for them.

I am not a religious person, but I have faith and believe in a higher power. I am usually very private about my faith, but then again, I am rarely touched by a stranger's story as I am Christi's.

Please, check them out. Say a prayer. I'm sure you will admire them as much as the rest of us.